Written by Mofoluwake Omololu.
“These oyinbo people and their ways sef, which one is couples meditation again,” Lola commented as they made their way up the stairs. They didn’t use the elevator because Lola wanted to ‘see’ the resort, and the views were worth the five flights of stairs they had to climb while she wandered back and forth the floors.
“Yeah well, you have to admit, the meditation, though weird was very relaxing. The smell of wet sand and the sound of the waves were all that were on my mind.” Kola replied.
They stumbled into their room laughing at the inscription on a plaque in the hall way.
They had dinner before coming up, so the next logical thing to do was sleep and they both prepared for bed.
Kola remarked that being in the bad was the perfect end to a very relaxing day, they had gotten massages earlier. A couples’ one, it was part of the resorts schedule.
They called to check in on their uncle back home, he was doing well and hoped they were making the best of their time away.
They put off the light and let the moon light create dancing images on their wall.
Kola sighed. Lola asked why he had sighed. He said it was nothing, but then he kept talking.
He said he had the best day today, and amazing meals and desserts, and that he felt like he should be content, and that he felt almost happy. Just something was missing and he couldn’t look past it. It was like an iceberg popping out of nowhere and disrupting a joyride. He sighed again.
Lola didn’t say a word or budge.
“That doctor is crazy you know, that doctor ‘Kolo-mental.” Kola continued.
He’d just started, “the doctors suggestion wasn’t just absurd but abnormal. Why would God join man and woman together with obvious agenda to procreate and then society, science or whatever name they now go by, will tell us that the only way to conceive is to ask an outsider to help you. What rubbish?! Haven’t they heard that God’s time is the best? Look at Abraham and Sarah, they waited over forty years before God blessed them and Isaac’s name is a big deal.”
At this point Lola interrupted him, “while they waited for their own they got help from elsewhere remember? Ishmael?” she laughed.
Kola didn’t get the joke as he sat up and switched on the bed side light. Lola, too, sat up because he didn’t look as calm as he had professed to be not so long ago.
“What are you saying Lola? I hope you’re not saying what it seems like you are saying? ”
Lola was in a good mood so she went on.” well, I’m not sure what you’re thinking I’m thinking, but, seriously, maybe the doctor wasn’t toying with us or being pervasive. Maybe that was his best suggestion and maybe we should give it some thought.”
“You do realize that eventually Ishmael was a burden and had to be sent away. God’s plan was for them to wait, Abraham and Sarah, but they went ahead of themselves and that part didn’t end well. And, in fact, Ishmael’s mother was a concubine. The way I understand, it was an adulterous relationship,” Kola was saying but Lola was taken by surprise at his reasoning.
“Ah Kola! how dare you accuse the father of faith of adultery. And wait before you go on, you realize you don’t have to know who your surrogate is in this age. You don’t even have to have sex to get pregnant.”
He looked like she had suddenly grown another head so she explained: “there’s a level of advancement to this whole thing, they get you a list of men willing to donate their sperm, could be for a fee, but they donate and we can pick the sperm with the best features and characteristics. Based on the anonymous donors details. It’s not adultery, I won’t be having sex with anybody. Just having a bab… ”
” What! ” Kola shouted as he sprung off the bed
.”Do you even hear yourself? I cannot believe this.” he paced back and forth. “I thought you were reasonable, but then you go and consider this absurdity? You’re even explaining how this isn’t adultery? I cannot believe this, really”
Lola, too, was on her feet, enraged. The central lighting had been switched on.
“I’m unreasonable (she claps), Mr. Reasonable man, oya hit me with your wise words. What have you had to offer in our five years of being married? Abi, because I fear God and have been humoring you. Let me remind you, you’re the cause of our predicament. You’re not offering any solutions instead you’re putting down the one offered you. I wasn’t even considering it, but since you brought it up I figured we better address it thoroughly so we know it’s not an option. But no, Mr. Victim. Mr. Opinionated. Mr., wo, you’ve annoyed me o. Calling me unreasonable for addressing a serious point of call with you. Ha!”
The row went on and on, back and forth, back and forth.
Eventually, Lara ran crying into the bathroom. By the time she came out, Kola, his pillow and the extra blanket the resort was so kind to leave in the rooms were gone and the living room area shut.
Lara cried herself to sleep as she cursed the silly doctor who was the genesis of their row that night, and left her sleeping alone this night after all the enabling environment was created.